Women Over 40

Today I received a junk email called Women over 40 Rules!  I went ballistic. There was a lot of F***U.  I trashed the email unread right away.  I have just heard about my limit of ten ways I’m not cutting it and Bleep, Bleep, Bleep Emergency Bikini season, the world will end.  Now, I have rules for women over 40.  Well I’m over 50 so … What is the sound you make when you stick out your tongue and do a raspberry? UGH!

Buoyancy

Yesterday I was annoyed as I often am in general.  I was attempting the front crawl in the pool and unfortunately at my weight I am just too buoyant.  I can feel that my butt is out of the water ‘cause there is just that much junk in the trunk.  My back is arched too much because my breasts want to head for the surface as well. When I do the back crawl all is fine.  My body is supported low in the water by my inner-tube butt and the chest is no longer an issue.  Unfortunately you can’t zone out doing back crawl or you will hit the wall so that workout becomes boring fast.

New Lifestyle

Today I began my new lifestyle of decadent, relaxed living.  I hope!  NO!  I know!!!!  New Lifestyle.  It sounds like a new magazine with me in my lazy-boy on the cover. When I decided that going back to swimming more often was the key to getting results with my fitness and stress I also decided to put in a request at work to switch my hours to Noon to 8PM and they said yes.  I know I was shocked as well.  I mean I don’t mess around too much but I didn’t know if the decision makers knew that.  Of course I started this experiment right after we had a time change so my body is going to figure I am working from 1PM to 9PM.  I’ll will likely be a complete zombie by the last hour.

Canadian Thanksgiving muddle!

Well this post is kind of off topic.  Maybe I should put it under  the category of mental health and fitness or stress management or aging without dignity.  I did something foolish.  I do a lot of foolish things actually but usually they don’t bite me in the butt as hard as this one. Here is the story.  You may have noticed that in Canada this weekend is a long weekend because it is Thanksgiving here.  I was invited down to my father’s house to celebrate with him and family on his side of his family.  It was also my 50th birthday last week and I was expecting some extra fuss to be made over me.  On that topic the YMCA ladies know how to make a proper fuss over a birthday gal!!!!  Thanks again to everybody! 

Happiness Follow-Up

You may recall my article from May 30 all about my definition of happiness.  I promised a follow up article to let you know how things worked out.  If you have not read that post you will not have a clue what I am talking about here. Well … a funny thing happened on the way to happiness.  If that raccoon had been paying attention as I watched my favorite show (Game of Thrones) he would know that “If you think this has a happy ending, you haven’t been paying attention.”

Happiness Is…

This Fat Chick gal sure is arrogant!  She disappears of the blog-o-sphere for a month and then comes back and thinks she can define happiness for everybody.  No I am not back from vacation or some other amazing experience I have actually been just mopping along spending too much time at work and not enough time on myself.  In fact in the spirit of being a mopey, grouchy pants I’m not going to share the ultimate secret of happiness, but I will tell you what made me happy today!  Coyote piss!

Laziness and Lack of Organization … Gulp!

OK Dudes and Dudettes!  No more moping around crying about the spring that never happened.  I know I lost my blogging and well, confession time, also my fitness mojo there for a while.  No more!  It’s time to brush the snow off my garden gnomes and power-wash the cobwebs off my house and reinvent myself again.  What is my most pressing issue right now?  Laziness and lack of organization.