Ok so I have decided to tackle one of those topics that I just don’t really feel fully prepared for. Of course my computer wants to misbehave and ding at me instead of record my brilliant observations.
I figure if I am going to put myself out there on the internet and talk about being fat I have to expect that people are going to think I speak for fat people in general. Umm No I speak for me! I can only guess what other fat people think, do or know, just like you. I also get a little irritated when somebody gets up on their soap box and says I speak for fat people or women or any other group that I belong to. Yeah I get it! If we are all speaking for ourselves to the world what you get is noise and no clear message.
So here goes, this is what I believe about fat people. I believe that everybody has the right to respect and equal opportunities.
When it comes to equal opportunities many times somebody has to lose. That means you may be too short for the roller coaster or too wide for the airline seat. You have to find another way or go home. It’s not fair but it is impossible to accommodate everybody all the time so somebody has to break out the measuring tape close their eyes and pick a number. Sometimes you lose because you didn’t phone ahead and make special arrangements, sometimes it’s because a business doesn’t care or didn’t plan ahead for every possible problem. It sucks but life is like that!
When it comes to respect well we have a lot of work ahead of us. Many groups are vilified and stereotyped and it is wrong and simplistic and most of the time I figure it is one of the ugliest of the human traits. I take comfort in recognizing that the bully is the one with a problem looking for a victim to vilify and vent his problems on. How do I deal with bullies? I ignore them. Is that the best approach? Maybe not. I admire the people that stand up and fight but to me it is wasted energy. Maybe we can do better with the next generation and the one after that and the one after that. That is my way. I’m not going to change so there is no way that I am going to put myself out there as a representative for fat people or for incredibly attractive, genius women either. So you genius woman can stop asking me!
On the other hand I think I need to step up my game and be a little more proactive about confrontations. A few days ago I mentioned to a friend that one gym member’s activities annoyed several of us on a regular basis. My friend confronted this woman she had never seen before and in a friendly manner asked her why she was creating the annoyance. The woman immediately changed her ways and is on great terms now with the friend that confronted her. I have a bad feeling that makes me the gossipy whiner! Who knew it was so easy? Yeah I know I’m off topic!!
Oh and yes I use the word fat and no I don’t find it offensive since that is the correct name for the stuff hanging onto my hips that make me look different than another person. I am equally not offended by being called the brown haired, white woman or the incredibly attractive, genius women!